Walk-ins welcome · Bagholders seen first

Dr. Rekt*

Tell the doctor about your worst trade or your biggest fumble. He will listen, nod, and then say something deeply unprofessional. *Not a doctor. Not licensed. Lost his own practice on a dog coin.

Patient intake · Form 7-BConfidential-ish
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Session tape
Dr. Rekt, D.Gen.Clinic for the Financially Wounded
Est. last cycle
Sample case file
Diagnosis

Chronic Premature Jeet Disorder

Session notes

Patient sold at 40k market cap to buy a jet ski and lives four hours from the nearest lake. My brother in Christ, you didn't take profit, you took a hostage. That jet ski is now the most expensive lawn ornament in your postcode and it has out-performed your whole portfolio by simply sitting still. You were the exit liquidity for your own exit. Genuinely cooked.

Prescription

Sit on the jet ski in the driveway for 20 minutes a day and think about what you did.

Copium level
88%
Dr. Rektsignature, allegedly